Lately I've been living a distracted life.
Muffin turned 1 month old today. My newest baby girl is 1 month already, and I feel as though I've missed it all. Though she's spent much of her time in my arms, she hasn't spent much having my attention. Her diaper is changed while I assign chores to the other kids, she's nursed while I discuss math problems with my 8 year old, or behaviour problems with my 3 year old. Her snuggle time is short lived because of the 1 year old who really only wants snuggle time lately when she sees someone else is getting it, and mommy must oblige a bit because the 1 year olds day has been filled with mommy being too distracted by dealing with the 3 year olds behaviour to give her much attention at all. The 3 year old is acting up more than ever because she's not getting what she needs because mommy is busy changing and nursing the baby and trying to pay a little attention to the 1 year old, while calling out math help to the 8 year old in the kitchen, who isn't understanding because mommy is too busy with the misbehaving 3 year old, while snuggling the 1 year old, while feeding the baby, while trying to get the dog not to steal the 3 year olds food, while the cat is meowing at the gate wanting to come up and get some attention, while thinking about getting dinner ready, while realizing she's forgotten to take something out for dinner, while realizing it's already too late to start anything anyway, while realizing she hasn't gone grocery shopping and there isn't any food anyway while the phone keeps ringing (telemarketers AGAIN)...when daddy comes home...and wants some attention which mommy can't give him because she's frantically trying to put something together for dinner while patting the head of the 1 year old attached to her leg, while discussing the 3 year olds behaviour for the day, and whining about trying to focus when she's had no sleep, while............ you get the picture.
At the end of the night, when I close my eyes I begin to realize...I haven't even really looked my kids or my husband in the eyes today, in fact when was the last time I did? I talk to them while taking care of something else, always focused on something else, not one of them is getting my undivided attention, my attention is ALWAYS divided lately. The few moments of peace I may get I'm so overwhelmed that I fill it with more distractions...TV (our whole 1 channel) or Internet, which makes me more overwhelmed because nothing is getting done.
There was something else too...something really important that needed my attention, something that deserved and commanded my undivided attention, something I should be putting first...now what was that again? OH right GOD! How easy it is to become distracted and overwhelmed, and veer off the path while not focused where you should be.
You need to pay attention, have your eyes open, and be present in everything you do, and if you're not first and foremost focused on God, it's easy to lose sight of what it is you should be doing, and are at risk of spending your life distracted by things you "think" you should be doing.
This week, and for the rest of my life, I'm going to work at being present in the things that God says I should be doing. I need to reconnect with Him first, remember the tasks He's set out for me, understand His priorities for my life, and give them my undivided, eyes wide open attention....and now I must finish...because the girls are all starting to wake up, and they all need my undivided, eyes on them attention. So I will get them each up, look them in the eyes one by one, and tell them I love them, and most importantly, that God loves them.
Linking up here: