It's funny sometimes, how exactly God opens our eyes to things. Things He's made us aware of, but that we don't understand until a critical moment, and then, boom. You get it.
I've been feeling a little uninspired. I didn't know what God wanted me to write about next. My husband told me that God said my next post would be on asking for or accepting help. Hmmph. I thought.
Our current situation is what I implied that to. Asking for help financially, accepting financial help from others. See, we have been in "need" financially for years (never quite this bad, but still always in need), we have been blessed with help financially for years. I didn't want to "ask" for help in this area. I was adamant this was something we needed to start really taking care of ourselves. I would accept help if God provided it for us, but my "asking" for help was now going to go towards asking for others to be helped and to be blessed. I just didn't feel in my heart that God wanted me to write on asking others for help in this way.
Skip ahead a few days....I'm going through the worst bought of hormonal mood swings I have ever experienced. We're talking 3 days of pure angry insanity! My poor poor family. I don't know how to control this, I've tried "giving it to God" I've prayed, I've yelled I've screamed I've cried, nothing is getting me out of this.
Then, yesterday I read a post on depression, and as I responded to the post, I was reminded of what we really need to focus on and where we really need to turn, and who we really need to ask for help in our times of need.....God. Yes, I prayed, I tried giving it to God, I'm sure I even verbally cried out to Him for help. But I stayed focused on my anger, I stayed absorbed in my little hissy fits, in my thoughts, I stayed focused on those lies that were being whispered or sometimes yelled at me inside. I didn't truly ask for help.
I sat beside the pool, proclaiming I wanted to be cured, expecting somehow to be cured, but doing nothing to actually get myself in there. I forgot to turnover! I forgot to turn my focus to God, to His light, to His love, to His forgiveness, and mercy and grace. I forgot to turn to helping others and I turned in the wrong direction, inwards towards myself.
I prayed in my moments of being alone crying in the bathroom for it all to stop, but I didn't pray when I felt myself getting upset in the moment, and I never once turned my attention to God.
In every moment, in every distress, in every unhappy thought, turn your focus to God, turn your thoughts and heart to God as you ask for help. Turn to the one you are speaking to, look directly at Him, then, ask for help!
7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire, and it shall be done for you.